Giving up smoking?

I am tussling with the thought, ‘better to smoke or not to smoke’? Thankfully I managed to give up when I became pregnant with L aged 42 but Now secretly yearn for a vice that gives me a pause and reflect moment in fact I’ve taken to looking at smokers admiringly as they seem to be becoming a brave minority. But it’s my husband these thoughts refer to. He was a hardened smoker and could rarely be found without a cigarette pressed to his lips. He did manage to give up for 5 months when L was born but struck up again in Africa. Then for the girls he found greater resolve as being an older dad there’s the added incentive that it might extend his fathering years, a bleak but real consideration. Anyway it’s been pretty torturous for him and now 15 months later he still masticates frantically on nicotette gum. The slurping chew chew punctuates everything and puts us all on edge. Plus there’s the bursts of anger and almost constant irritability. But the bit that has finally pushed me to wanting to thrust a cigarette into his hand is the dried up dollups of gum I find everywhere, waiting to be used again. Oh it’s just horrible. And just imagine, tonight I picked one off the side of the cot and then my greatest fear... W picked off another I had missed and was just putting it in her mouth when I swooped down and snatched it just in time. A cigarette suddenly seems so harmless...